Lost Time

Photo Credit - Matissse - Odalisque with a Turkish Chair - 1928

I’ve been on somewhat of a writing hiatus since the end of February. Not something I gave any thought to or planned in advance. It happened without notice. It happened without warning. It simply just happened. Lost time.

Admittedly, a series of personal challenges occurred, coupled with the loss of two very important and dear friends, who, together for over 50 years, passed within 11 days of each other.

Funny thing is this loss of time happened so slowly I almost didn’t recognize what was happening, until it did. It’s as if I’d been wearing a pair of tinted glasses that darkened gradually but deliberately over time.

For me to complete even the simplest of tasks required a Herculean effort like suiting up to scale Kilimanjaro. Forget about more complex or involved responsibilities. It was paralyzing and defeating.

And yet, I continued to move through everyday routines, paying almost no attention to what was happening to me personally, ignoring the undercurrent, as if nothing was going on in the background.

Major holidays and events occured. A new Pope. A gray, cold winter turned into a gorgeous lush spring. Birthdays.

And just like that, irretrievable months, weeks, days and minutes lost, until one day I picked my head up and it was May. And with it, the resolve it was beyond time to pay attention.

I feel like this is precisely what’s going on in our country —- we are walking through it all, detached, devoid of time, seemingly unaware of how life as we’ve known it, is slowly but deliberately vanishing.

We are being governed by fiat. In an effort to expand and consolidate executive power, bypassing and eliminating traditional checks and balances, Trump has enacted 157 Executive Orders since January 20th. None of these EO’s have been debated and passed by Congress, a co-equal branch of government. No hearings, no deliberative debate. Just one man, surrounded by extreme zealots, preparing and writing orders for his signature, the Constitution be damned. Because to hear them tell it —- “this is what the voters wanted.”

But did they?

In the last few days, Trump has pardoned two reality tv stars who were convicted of defrauding banks out of more than $30 million, a former Virginia Sheriff convicted of taking $75,000 in bribes in exchange for handing out deputy badges and his border czar, Tom Homan, earned consulting fees from an immigration detention firm, the same firm that will directly benefit as Homan shapes U.S. immigration policy to massively expand detention centers. Corruption.

Under the guise of eradicating “anti semitism” and “woke” policies, he is going after higher learning institutions, Harvard in particular, with a vengeance. Trump is targeting a private establishment, with demands issued by authoritarians, a direct attack on academic freedom, threats to deport foreign students whose ideology don’t align with the administration’s and politicizing federal funds, using them as weapons. Where does it end?

In a blink, the FBI arrested a federal judge, a U.S. Attorney is charging a Democratic lawmaker with a crime, the Executive Branch is going after Democratic-allied law firms and shaking them down.

One of the most egregious to say nothing of nation-changing, is the never-ending quest to Make America White Again, triggered by border and ICE agents, law enforcement deputized as ICE and other unidentifiable officers —- because all of the above show up masked, more often-than-not without badges —- whisk people off the streets, throw them into unmarked vans then delivered to places unknown. No access to lawyers. No access to family. No notice. No hearings. All without due process, a legal principle that ensures fair treatment through our judicial system, as enshrined in the Constitution —- a fundamental protection against arbitrary denial of life, liberty or property by the government.

On the campaign trail, Trump told us he was going to implement the largest deportation operation in U.S. history. In a faux effort to “keep the nation safe,” he was going to ensure the most dangerous criminals would be deported. The reality is it has not stopped there. U.S. Citizens are being swept up. Green card holders are being deported. Immigrants who appear for their hearings are having their cases dismissed then being arrested when they leave the courtroom. If you have Black or Brown skin, and God forbid, tatoos, you’re gone.

The on-again, off-again tariffs; The Big Beautiful Bill; making multi-billion dollars deals with countries that launched an attack against us, killing thousands and ordered the brutal and gruesome dismemberment of a Washington Post journalist; Trump’s multi-billion dollar pay-to-play side hustle; a president who when asked, can’t answer whether or not he’ll follow the Constitution and is in bed with some of the most notorious dictators/authoritarians; DODGE massacres and the avalanche of Project 2025 edicts.

This is our country. Home of the Brave. Land of the Free.

And so, here we are. Another day, week and month go by. We sit. We watch.

To quote the Handmaid’s Tale, June Osborne:

“Fighting may not get us everything. But we don’t have a choice. Because not fighting is what gave us Gilead to begin with.

Gilead does not need to be beaten. It needs to be broken.”